I once had a guy bully me, call me names, and daily drag me around the playground by my arms while I cried, kicked and screamed. He also pushed me often and made me fall out of line and get in trouble for ‘misbehaving’ because he kept poking me and tickling me when we were supposed to be quiet. This went on through all of elementary school. When I told my parents and teachers, they said ‘he just has a crush on me’.
(submitted by anonymous)
Here is a thing I made to help you art.
how on earth is this supposed to be helpful. their body types are not even remotely comparable to one another.
It’s mocking a lot of tutorials that draw guys as really angular and tough and girls as curvy and super femme.
This really makes it clear how few important female characters are included in Harry Potter. Such a shame.
With the blogs I follow, I thankfully see most of these discussed and thought of quite often on my dash. The one I really don’t see often at all: elderly women. I just realized I haven’t thought of feminism in terms of elderly women in quite a long time.
Go here for an article about sexism in the media that touches on elderly women.
Or here for a short article on how age and gender intersect.
Buy Look Me In the Eye: Old Women, Aging and Ageism to read about ”young women’s alienation from old women, their dread of becoming them, their revulsion toward old women’s bodies … (‘Your power as a younger woman is measured by the distance you can keep between you and older women’).”
Check out the Old Women’s Project, based out of San Diego, California, USA.
Read Aging, Discrimination and Older Women’s Human Rights on the Global Aging website.
Buy Women, Aging and Ageism (different book) to read about “issues of deep concern to women at midlife and beyond, including the politics of reproduction, sexuality, social isolation, violence against women, equal opportunity, and the feminization of poverty.”
Also check out a video of Willow Smith, her mother and her grandmother for an interesting conversation about generations and relationships and stuff.
Seth MacFarlane made a whole bunch of sexist, reductive jokes at the Oscars last night. It’s frustrating enough to know that 77 percent of Academy voters are male. Or to watch 30 men and 9 women collect awards last night. ButMacFarlane’s boob song, the needless sexualization of a little girl, and the relentless commentary about how women look reinforced, over and over, that women somehow don’t belong. They matter only insofar as they are beautiful or naked, or preferably both. This wasn’t an awards ceremony so much as a black-tie celebration of the straight white male gaze.
MacFarlane’s opening musical number, “We Saw Your Boobs,” might as well have been a siren blaring, “This isn’t for you.”Come on, everyone likes boobs, right?No. The answer is no. They’re not something I hate, and heck, I have a pair to call my own, and yet my takeaway fromThe Accusedwas not “Finally, I’ve seen Jodie Foster’s breasts.” My lasting memory ofBoys Don’t Cryis not “Hey, free breasts!” At least there was that super timely and relevant reference to Kate Winslet’s many nude scenes.
Jeez, the song was a joke! Can’t you take a joke?Yes, I can take a joke. I can take a bunch! A thousand, 10,000, maybe even more! But after 30 or so years, this stuff doesn’t feel like joking. It’s dehumanizing and humiliating, and as if every single one of those jokes is an ostensibly gentler way of saying, “I don’t think you belong here.” All those little instances add up, grain of sand by grain of sand until I’m stranded in a desert of every “tits or GTFO” joke I’ve ever tried to ignore.
Then came the joke about actresses getting the flu to lose weight. “It paid off,” MacFarlane said. “Looking good.” Well, thank God, because what matters to all women is that we look good for Seth MacFarlane. How many women did he introduce over the course of the night by mentioning how they looked: “Please welcome the lovely ___ ,” “the beautiful ______”? How many men?
Uh, those are compliments! Now he can’t even give women compliments?Compliment away, friends. Let’s compliment the shit out of each other. But let’s be really cognizant of what we compliment each other on, and what that says about what we expect from each other, and what we consider valuable and worth mentioning. It doesn’t matter what Salma Hayek says, because she’s so pretty!
You just don’t like Seth MacFarlane’s sense of humor. What did you expect?Actually, I do like Seth MacFarlane’s sense of humor. (Sometimes. No one likes everything all the time!) I’ve been a loyalFamily Guyviewer for almost fifteen years. I’ve been to — and adored —Family Guy: Live. If MacFarlane had sung “Shipoopi” all night, I’d be writing a really different story right now. Instead, there were jokes about how Rex Reed would probably call Adele fat —because that’s what’s important about her— and how someday Quvenzhané Wallis will be old enough to date George Clooney — because that’s what’s important about her— and how sometimes, gasp, a woman might have body hair —because that’s what’s important about them. Women are nags, and Jews run Hollywood! Thank you, Seth MacFarlane, for this cutting-edge humor. Like Mark Wahlberg said, the party’s at Jack Nicholson’s house. You remember, that place where Roman Polanski drugged and raped a 13-year-old girl. Ha-ha, ha-ha, ha.
I dream of someday watching women win all the non-performance categories, of women making as many films as men do, of women and men being nominated for a comparable number of awards. There are a lot of reasons why that day is far, far in the future. But I’ll tell you what’s not helping: the biggest night in film being dedicated to alienating, excluding, and debasing women. Actual gender equality is a ways away, but I’d settle for one four-hour ceremony where women aren’t being actively degraded.
I love this post SO MUCH.
seriously I do not know how many times (especially since I started law school) I have been pressured into drinking by a guy
Like literally I know my limits
I know when I want to stop
and guys do not take that shit seriously
I can tell them “No, I’m good, I’m small, I’m asian, I have no tolerance, I am already buzzing quite nicely”
and they’ll be like “no nonono I’ll buy you one’
and I’ll be like “hell no, I’m fine, you don’t need to”
and then they’ll buy me one anyways
and be like
YOU HAVE TO DRINK IT NOW THAT I’VE BOUGHT YOU ONE
and it’s like
fuck, why did you buy me one? I didn’t want one
and then it’s like
if I’m drinking water
they’ll take this as a personal affront
yOU CAN’T DO THAT
GET BLACKOUT DRUNK
DRINK MORE MORE MORE
fuck you bitch
I don’t want more
I want you to leave
I don’t want to owe you shit
i was once at a party where a guy got so fed up with my friend refusing his drinks that he cornered her outside and tried to pour beer down her throat. i hate everything.
I need everybody to know about and understand what the social contract is. People seem to think we’re saying that women have no willpower, and guys aren’t forcing them to do anything (although in the above case, hey look) - and this is simply untrue. Creating a social contract is coercion and often leads to scary results when you want to break it: men flipping out at women in bars and in the street outside the bar, following you around and sometimes home because you haven’t responded in a way deemed appropriate by the contract. There are men who are so offended at a woman not cooperating with the social contract they’re trying to create that they do these things, they harass, they start fights, they ruin people’s night out, they push and push until you look like the crazy one to everybody around you because you don’t want their fucking drink. Even your own friends will side with this guy and it gets to the point where you either remain the bitch or you cave and take the drink (or whatever the contract is about at that time), at which point the contract suddenly extends and stops being about the drinks. Now that you’ve taken his drink, it’s about conversation - you’re now the bitch if you don’t sit with him and talk, how dare you take the drink and walk away. And that right there is exactly what proves this is a contractual situation - taking the drink is supposed to be agreeing to the terms of the contract that they’ve decided on, and if you’ve ever taken a drink and walked away you know what kind of behaviour follows.
Also, because I’m positive I will get messages about this, DO NOT send me messages saying this never happens or you’ve never seen it. I don’t care if you’ve never seen it. Something not happening to you or around you doesn’t mean it’s not true, and discounting anecdotal evidence is not cool. Especially when a man’s anecdotal evidence that he has never ever done this is totally valid to you, but the woman’s story about how it’s happened to her is “exaggeration” or plain lies. No. Don’t click the ask button.—
Someone give this guy a motherfuckin’ certificate.
I reblog every time
this guy deserves more than a certificate
“In year 7 you were already uncomfortable around me, so I manipulated our teacher into putting us together for a project and when you didn’t want to come to my house, instead of meeting in a neutral place like a library, I did the entire project so that you’d owe me. In year 8 I gave you a bunch of gifts, a really inappropriate quantity, and continued to do so even after you made it abundantly clear that you didn’t want them. By the time the school disco rolled around in year 9, you knew me well enough to know that I wouldn’t take no for an answer, so you made up an excuse and left the whole dance to escape from me, and somehow it’s me and not you who got the worst end of that stick. In year 10, I bought you another grossly inappropriate gift that required you to spend time with me in order to use it, and when you misunderstood how I wanted you to use it I didn’t say anything but just stewed on that information. And now, in year 11, I’m going to publish my victim complex and the entire history of how I’ve stalked you over the past five years, comfortable in the knowledge that because I’m a man, I will be taken seriously and you’ll be vilified.”
She has every right to think boys are dicks. Here’s example number one. This post is really really gross. He shouldn’t get a certificate; he needs to get a restraining order.
Reblogging solely for the commentary and to highlight that this is an example of how men are taught that they are owed a woman’s affections merely because they want it.
After four years of this sort of behaviour, with no reciprocation, you are not a romantic guy, you are a stalker.
He clearly loves the idea of this girl, rather than the actuality of her. And he presumes ownership of this creation he’s invented in his head, with no regard for the real woman who actually inhabits the body.
He was a stalker when he manipulated his teacher just so he could work with her. It’s incredibly creepy that he kept going with it when she gave him every signal she could that she wasn’t interested. Whilst I haven’t done most of the things she did, I have faked going to the toilet to escape a guy who wouldn’t leave me alone. He caught up with me anyway, insisted on ‘walking me home’ and wouldn’t leave me until I’d consented to let him kiss me on the forehead. He probably still thinks the whole thing is romantic. In fact, I know he does, because he later found me at a bar where I was hanging out with my friends, most of whom were male and none of whom helped me when I was trying to persuade him to go away, and all of whom told me I had ‘all the power’ in this relationship, because I got to tell him ‘no’ if I didn’t want him.
Because saying ‘no’ realy helped me so much.
So, yeah, it’s kinda bitchy for her to take both tickets off you and go with someone else (I would have just refused the tickets), but I can’t blame her for it. What you did to her all those years was a sick power-play, to which she responded by finally taking something back for herself and going to see a band she loved with someone with whom she felt safe and not a guy who clearly wouldn’t take ‘no’ for an answer.
‘Nice guys’ like you are the reason why I’m afraid to say ‘yes’ to anyone.
Tori Amos (via queerintersectional) —
These tests are to analyze your automatic preferences by how you associate pictures and words. This is the distribution for those who have taken the race test:
Strong automatic preference for White people48%Moderate automatic preference for White people13%Slight automatic preference for White people12%Little or no automatic preference12%Slight automatic preference for Black people6%Moderate automatic preference for Black people4%Strong automatic preference for Black people6%
48% of test takers have a strong automatic preference for white people. 73% of test takers have an overall leaning toward white people.
This link has the same test for race, but also has many other tests available.
(…) Using “emotional” as a dog-whistle to marginalize women’s concerns—or the concerns of any other non-privileged group, for that matter—doesn’t make you better than overt misogynists who call women hysterics, and you’re really not fooling anybody.
Implicitly juxtaposing “emotion” against “reason/rationality” treats the two as mutually exclusive processes, which they are not. The human response to many things is both emotional and rational/reasoned.
The damnable lie that reason without emotion is the only reasoning worth shit is one of the most pernicious myths of the Patriarchy, inextricably tied to the woman- and man-hating presumption that women are emotional and men are reasonable (and thus is reason superior to emotion).
Men are emotional creatures as much as are women.
(…) The exhortation to extricate emotion from reason, commonly wielded against women to dismiss their rightful ire at the manifestations of their oppression, is as unrealistic and dishonest as it is a contemptible pile of fetid, stinking rubbish.
Melissa McEwan, Shakesville.comsugarina-chan) —
“The Bank of England came under fire last night for “institutional sexism”, after it held a seminar for female staff to advise them on what clothing, shoes and make-up to wear.
In a week when the IMF announced that the British economy will be the hardest hit of all the developed nations, when strikes erupted across the country and as world leaders gathered in Davos to discuss global recession, senior figures at the Bank turned their minds to lipstick and high heels.
On Wednesday, Bank of England employees gathered for a Dress for Success summit, at which female employees were lectured on the importance of wearing appropriate jewellery and make-up in the workplace.
A memo leaked from the meeting details the advice given to staff, including the warning that wearing certain accessories would make women workers look like prostitutes.
”Look professional, not fashionable; be careful with perfume; always wear a heel of some sort – maximum two inches; always wear some sort of makeup, even if it’s just lipstick,” read the memo. It was distributed by the professional image consultancy firm hired by the bank for the event.
”Shoes and skirt must be the same colour. No-nos include ankle chains – “professional, but not the one you want to be associated with” – white high heels; overstuffed handbags; an overload of rings, and double-pierced ears,” it continued.
The Bank of England confirmed yesterday that the session had taken place, but refused to comment further.
Leading equal opportunities solicitors said last night that female employees would have a potential case for legal action against the Bank of England for sexual discrimination. “It is indicative of an institutionally sexist environment. If women are being judged by what they wear, then it suggests that they are being treated differently to male employees,” said Lawrence Davies of solicitors Equal Justice .
“The fact that they are putting the responsibility on independent consultants doesn’t absolve the bank of any sexist behaviour or attitudes that arise from this,” said Mr Davies.
The bank’s actions sparked widespread criticism, with leading City economists, MPs and women’s rights groups all speaking out. “What the Bank of England is doing is appalling,” said Ruth Lea, economic advisor to the Arbuthnot Banking Group and former director of the Centre for Policy Studies. “They are spending our money on these things. It is farcical.”
”Surely it is up to men and women, and their peers at work to decide for themselves what is suitable to wear. If you can get a well-paid job, surely you have the nous to choose the right clothes,” said Ms Lea.
The Fawcett Society, the leading women’s rights group, said that the Bank of England’s actions were sexist, and run contrary to equal opportunity legislation. “Not only will eyebrows be raised that an event like this has been held just as we are entering recession, but it sends out damaging messages to women working at the Bank of England,” said Katherine Rake, director of the society.
”Setting down codes in this way sends a message to women employees that they have to look a certain way to be successful in business, and this is absolutely contra equal opportunities practice.”
Corporate image consultants can cost anything up to £5,000 for a 30- minute session. While dress codes are standard in many professions, specifying the colour of heels that should be worn and insisting on make-up is interpreted by many as sexist.
But Pippa Rees, director of Naked Ambition Personal Branding Consultants, and a member of the Federation of Image Consultants, said: “How you dress can make you have more authority and command more respect. Women struggle with what to wear for business and formal wear, and image consultants can make women aware of how clothes can add to their credibility, and how they can diminish it.”
“If you are a banker, a lawyer or an accountant you are a professional, and your client will expect you to look like one. A pilot’s uniform denotes his ability to do the job, and professional dress does the same,” said Ms Rees.
Accountancy firm Ernst & Young also courted controversy last November when it sent 400 female employees on a course to learn how to dress.
‘What the Bank of England is doing is appalling. They are wasting our money’
‘[This tells] women employees that they have to look a certain way to be successful’
‘If this is not a hoax, then they should be ashamed. It is not what they should be focusing on’
Patricia Hewitt MP
‘I hope that there is no assumption that how you look dictates how you can do your job’
Baroness Morris”This pisses me off because I am physically incapable of wearing heels. Took a couple foot surgeries before I could wear anything other than tennis shoes. Would I then have to get a doctor’s note? And the obsession with matching shoes/skirts, no handbags of this colour, etc. all point out the hypocrisy of their statement “look professional, not fashionable.”Did they have a ‘dress for success’ lecture to men? Did they instruct men on the correct use of hairgel, grooming products, and, of course, which socks to wear? After all, your shoes and your have to match. The watch can’t be too big or gaudy, or else you run the risk of looking like a prostitute.
this makes me really cranky. Every time somebody tells me the standards for men and women are the same I’m like ORLY? Because I have worked for the companies that evaluate staff in restaurants, banks, retail, and so on, and the dress requirements for men and women are specifically laid out. Men: collared shirt, black or grey pants, well groomed hair and facial hair trimmed or shaved. Women: length of skirt specified, types of acceptable straps and widths specified, heel height must be between 1 and 2.5 inches, shoes must be patent/not patent, hair styles are specific, quantity of makeup, jewelry, fingernails… and I’m fairly certain I’m missing more from that list. These restrictions are wholly unfair and anybody who can’t see that is completely blind. Requiring half the population to paint their faces to be allowed to work is asinine. The disparity between the two sets of requirements is obviously a problem. And really, if you think that a pilot’s ability to do their job is determined by their clothing then I hope to fuck that you are not in charge of hiring pilots.
Commentary on photo from “The Foundist”
“C’mon Anne, you’re better than this. Did you learn nothing from Britney and Paris? At Monday nights’s eagerly anticipated Les Miserables premiere, the film’s star, Anne Hathaway, had a serious wardrobe malfunction as she emerged from her car. Now, we know there is the ethical matter of whether these photos should be released to the public, but, honestly? She was the one who chose to fly commando on the night of the season’s biggest premiere. Though we liked you as Catwoman, please keep your kitty cat under wraps, Miss Hathaway. Your ladybits aren’t going to land you that Oscar.”
Congratulations you are a fucking asshole. A woman should be able to not wear underwear without worrying about some dick with a camera taking a picture of it and then having shitty amateur pop culture bloggers delegitimize all of her hard work and integrity for it. People make me sick sometimes what a goddamn shame.
It doesn’t even look to me like she’s commando… there is such a thing as white underwear. I really hate reporters like this.
Oh man. Oh man oh man oh man. Poor Jenna Marbles opened up a can of worms talking about sluts in her video. I went through the comments and it’s like every tumblr feminist and SJW came out of the woodwork. Holy crap this is hilarious. Oh lawd this here gonna be good! I cannot wait for a response video..
“monogamy is a state of higher evolution”
and my respect for jenna marbles just went out the window
SOLDIER: “… If I let a female beat me on that run I would have killed myself.”
ME: “Excuse me? Why does the sex of the person matter?”
ME: “Are you saying that a woman isn’t worthy of besting you at anything or that she is incapable of doing so? Either way, how about the next time you open your mouth you think of something a little less misogynistic to say… Sergeant.”
That’s when I realized he was an NCO and he realized that I’m not, so I got my ass chewed out for disrespecting him. Worth it.